https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-love-bombing-5223611

Love bombing is a tactic in which someone "bombs" you with extreme displays of attention and affection with the intent to manipulate you. Although being showered with "love" can seem positive at the beginning of a romantic relationship, love bombing can lead to gaslighting and abuse. Psychologists caution it might be a tactic used by a narcissist or sociopath in an attempt to control you.

What Does Love Bombing Feel Like?

At the beginning of getting to know each other, you might view this person in your relationship as charming and especially attentive. This person will praise you effusively, tell you they adore you, and often seem to emotionally attach way too quickly (love bombing often takes place at the onset of a relationship).

If you find yourself telling your friends your partner seems too good to be true, they just might be.

Love bombing also happens with couples after they have a big fight or break up. There's nothing wrong with giving someone a second chance, but if someone belittles you, then begs for forgiveness, promises it will never happen again and offers overly-grand gestures, like sending you five dozen roses to show how sorry they are, be cautious.

Especially common in cases of domestic violence, the abuser will inflict abuse, reiterate how much they love you and employ dramatic tactics to get in your good graces again to keep you in the relationship. The danger is that the abuser needs control and the same cycle repeats. They don't change their abusive behavior and you might be in harm's way.

What Are the Stages of Love Bombing?

Let's take a look at the stages of love bombing.

Idealization

Why does love bombing feel so good? Well, love bombers sweep you off your feet. It's nice to be flooded with dopamine, the feel-good chemical your brain releases. As Dr. Amy E. Keller, PsyD, MFT points out, "it feels great when a new potential love interest starts sexting you or bombards you with texts, calls, and flowers."

But a common sign of a love bomber: they don't do anything halfway. During the first phase, there is idealization. They seem to put you on a pedestal. This can seem flattering, but they idealize you too quickly. In fact, everything seems to happen too quickly.

Devaluation

One of the telling signs of being love bombed occurs during the second phase, the devaluation stage. Your partner alternates between being kind one minute and cruel the next. They're savvy enough to be loving in public so that others think they're great. But they turn abusive, especially in private.

These individuals are amazingly adept at finding those who are vulnerable. For example, they'll prey on those who just got divorced, recently broke up with someone, or have low self-esteem.

In the first study1 to empirically analyze love bombing behaviors, researchers found a correlation between love bombing and narcissism, insecure attachment style, and low self-esteem using a sample group of 484 college students.

These millennials sent excessive communications at the beginning of romantic relationships to gain power and control over their love interests. The scientists noted millennials have shown a major increase in narcissism compared to previous generations.